Prophets of a Future Not Our Own

I decided this deserved its own post.  Here is the reminder I need.

Prophets of a Future Not Our Own

It helps, now and then, to step back and take the long view. The kingdom is not only beyond our efforts, it is beyond our vision. We accomplish in our lifetime only a tiny fraction of the magnificent enterprise that is God's work. No thing we do is complete, which is another way of saying that the kingdom always lies beyond us. No statement says all that could be said. No prayer fully expresses our faith. No confession brings perfection. No pastoral visit brings wholeness. No program accomplishes the church's mission. No set of goals and objectives includes everything. 

This is what we are about: we plant seeds that one day will grow. We water seeds already planted, knowing that they hold future promise. We lay foundations that will need further development. We provide yeast that produces effects beyond our capabilities. We cannot do everything and there is a sense of liberation in realizing that. This enables us to do something, and to do it very well. It may be incomplete, but it is a beginning, a step along the way, an opportunity for God's grace to enter and do the rest. 

We may never see the end results, but that is the difference between the master builder and the worker. We are workers, not master builders, ministers, not messiahs. We are prophets of a future not our own. Amen

(Archbishop Oscar Romero)

Vocation, part II.

Let us not tire of preaching love; it is the force that will overcome the world.  --Oscar Romero

So what led to LVC, Chicago, and the Howard Area Community Center?  Calling. Vocation. God. You know, the usual.  

I joined a church when I was fifteen.  I embarked on this endeavor with the support, but not companionship of my family, who left the Catholic Church years before I was born.  After trying several I finally found a community I wanted to be a part of and was baptized in September of 2003 at Hope Lutheran Church in Farmington Hills, Michigan.  At a youth retreat I met representatives from Capital University and while as a school it didn't fit many of my “checklist” I decided to visit.  Immediately upon that first visit I knew I'd attend Capital.   During my years at Capital I made it a personal task to understand what I was really saying when I said I was a Lutheran.  I found that I really did choose a church with which I was theologically compatible for the most part.  I also found a deep love of liberation theology and social justice.

These two things left me to strongly consider a service-year.  Representatives from the Lutheran Volunteer Corps kept visiting Capital and even though I knew all the answers I couldn't help attending their presentations.  I felt like Rory from Gilmore Girls who kept checking to see if anything had changed in the Harvard guidebook (too much? sorry).  I loved the idea that LVC was not only a year of service, but really focused on the individual.  This meshed very well with my belief that this year would be transformational in my life and it was not that I was going to be helping the helpless, but rather being in community and “doing life” with others.  I valued deeply LVC's commitments to social justice, simplistic living and intentional community.  I am passionate about social justice, I could use a few lessons about how to live more simply and I thrive in community.  There you have my decision to join LVC.  

I went through the application process earlier this year and by March was selecting locations to interview with.  As I'm fairly undecided about my future and passionate about a lot of things that narrowing process was extremely difficult.  I choose to heed the advice of wiser, past-LVC volunteers that continually reminding me not to choose a city, but rather choose by placement.  My final three interviews came through with a Immigrant detention lawyer service in Washington, DC, a case manager for asylum seekers in the Twin Cities, and a crisis specialist with the Howard Area Community Center in Chicago.  

I went through the interview process and although each had something to offer.  I just really fit well with HACC.  The responsibilities of this position are to run an emergency food pantry and to  offer help with a heating assistance program.  I have had prior experience with both of these through my time at Lutheran Social Services of Central Ohio's Choice Food Pantries.  

When I was able to ask questions of my interviewer, her answers resonated deeply within my soul.  Specifically I recall her discussion of the HACC (which does virtually every type of assistance).  She said that the HACC promotes education and family care.  It is important to the staff at the HACC that they are not enabling the cycle of poverty, but instead offering the individuals in the area resources to overcome their poverty and to contribute to the community more positively.  When I inquired about how as an agency HACC was contributing to ending violence in the area she again spoke to their commitment to transforming individuals and families within the area and through establishing relationships and demonstrating the negative effects of violence (even down to corporal punishment all the way through gun control) they were attempting to address the problem from a grassroots level.

Earlier this week I received my tentative housing assignment.  All of the LVC houses are named after an important activist.  I will be living in Casa Oscar Romero.  There are  truly fewer places that could be more fitting for me.  Archbishop Oscar Romero was one of the first liberation theologians I read.  I keep a prayer of sorts that he wrote posted in my room as a reminder (I'll post it at the end of this blog).  I have begun the introduction process with my three roommates.  Our home is four miles from my placement, seven blocks from the lake and extremely close to St. Augustine College, the only bilingual college in the mid-west.  

From the few details I have currently, this looks to be an extremely transformational year.  Perhaps even more than I realize now.

Peace,

Amanda 

Vocation

The place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet.  --Fredrick Buechner

Having attended a Lutheran (ELCA) University the discussion of vocation has been an instrumental part of my education.  Throughout our years at Capital we are challenged to consider not only what we'd like in a career, but truly what is our vocation.  Our calling, if you will.  This discussion has had a profound impact on my future.  It has allowed me to move forward without fear for security and instead allow God to move me where I should go.  

I, like my fellow blogger Jordan, cannot pinpoint a moment where I decided that I would serve.  It was much the same for me as it was for her, a series of events, a precisely placed community that led me to grow, and a truthful consideration that nothing else made sense for me.  

I will be serving through the Lutheran Volunteer Corps.  I will be a full-time staff member at the Howard Area Community Center located in Rogers' Park, Chicago.   (More details on the actual program later). 

More than anything other one thing I can attribute my desire to my experience in a course at Capital entitled "Liberation Theology: Service-Learning" and the community I gained from that course.  This course was the brain child of a group of dedicated students that had already participated in the Liberation Theology course offered by my religion department (I was not one of those students, but they have since become some of my greatest friends and most sincere motivators).  The students were profoundly effected by the initial course, but felt that the course was missing a significant component: actual service.  The newer course was constructed around several readings by prominent authors, discussion by the group, and weekly service, as individuals, with one of three local agencies.  I chose to work with the Lutheran Social Services Choice Food Pantries in Columbus, Ohio. 

My time in actual class transformed me intellectually.  The readings and my fellow students deeply challenged the way in which I viewed the world.  Liberation Theology is a movement that began primarily in the Catholic Church in Latin America in the later half of the 19th Century.  As a theology it empowers the poor against the oppressive structures created by this world.  One of the most difficult experiences was to admit that I too was a propagator of injustice simply because I am a member of a ruling class that benefits from an oppressive system.   

My time in service transformed me as an individual.  The time I spent in the Food Pantry challenged any and all preconceived notions I had, especially those that I did not realize I had.  I still today recall specific clients I helped, the first person I ever took around, the woman that was unbelievably grateful when I just listened, the man that restored my hope in family.  These individuals were amazing people I am so blessed to have met.  I volunteered at one pantry throughout the school year and interned at another location throughout the summer.  The staff gave me hope in the ability to create change and also made me realize that we are all flawed even those trying to do good.  

Throughout this course, and the rest of my time at Capital, I realized I simply could do nothing other than serve.  To do more than “help,” as I have learned that when I am truly in community with others help is not mine to give, but rather I open myself to serve, and love as Christ did, and recognize that in many ways it is I that will be transformed.  

This is the next step of my journey.  Thanks for coming with me. 

Peace,

Amanda 

Losing My Training Wheels

I apologize for not taking a post to explain myself and my position for the next year.  That will be for a later post.  For now, let's get right to the heart of my experiences.

I was about to start writing this and I had a flash back.  For whatever reason, though still unknown to me, I started thinking about when I first learned to ride a two-wheel bike.  My dad took me over to our churches parking lot to learn how to ride and we would spend what felt like hours, but was probably more like minutes, practicing turning, braking, stopping, starting, and everything in between.  I have a distinct memory of him running along next to me holding on to the back of my seat.  Of course, as all moms and dads eventually do, he let go and I continued to ride beautifully.  That is, I continued to ride until maybe 15 seconds later when I realized he was no longer holding on to me or even next to me.  He was cheering me on from across the parking lot, which, while supportive and all that, was not going to keep me from falling.  So like any good youngster learning to ride a bike, I immediately forgot everything that I had learned, let out a scream of panic, and promptly fell over. 

I have an unfortunate habit of recreating memories so I can’t guarantee that this happened exactly as I have recalled it.  But I think this memory will do for the coming metaphor.

I am now 2 weeks into my work here at First English Lutheran Church, at 1015 E. Main St., Columbus, OH 43205, with worship services at 8:30 and 10:30 and a community dinner on Thursday nights at 6 (alright, shameless plug over). 2 weeks in and I’m realizing that it’s all about learning to ride on my own.  Don’t get me wrong, the people at FELC are wonderful and supportive in a number of different ways and the pastor I’m working with has challenged me to look at this experience with a whole new spin.  But for the past 23 years (if we include a few months pre-birth) I have had a support system guiding my steps and most of my days.  Teachers, professors, parents, youth directors, mentors, whoever.  They have all been running along beside me holding me up as I learn to ride (it’s been a crowded parking lot with all of them).  But 2 weeks ago, they let go.  Last night was the end of my 15 seconds.  I realized I was on my own and promptly forgot everything I had learned and fell on my face.

You see, kids are great.  I love working with Youth and the passion that they have for life.  I want to be clear that I like working with kids.  Last night some kids were in the church when they weren’t supposed to be and I was trying to get them outside.  A lot of things happened but the end result is that none of them were choosing to listen to me.  The pastor came through and they left shortly thereafter.  That’s no big deal.  My panic and my fall came when I realized that I may have alienated 2 kids that I had hoped would be 2 of my strongest allies in this next year.  I know these 2 better than the other kids who were there and they were supposed to be at the church to meet with the pastor.  In the process of trying to get everyone outside I asked these 2 to leave hoping they would be an example to the other kids.  This plan did not work.  Instead the 2 kids thought that I was mad at them when they had not done anything wrong, which instantly put me into the category of every other adult they know…can you say oops?

I was overwhelmed by the entire situation.  9 kids in a echoing stairwell all talking at once is a little overwhelming.  Did I overreact?  It’s possible.  Without anyone else who was there to see what happened it is hard for me to say.  Did I show the grace and forgiveness of God?  Probably not.  This was my first real shot to build a relationship with some of these kids and I fell of the bike.  It is hard for me to find comfort in the thought that there will be many more days where I can ride much more successfully and fall much harder.  I suppose ultimately I need to suck up my own pride, apologize to the 2 kids that I hope will continue to help me, and try to rebuild and get back on my bike.

I guess I should finish my memory from earlier, or at least what I think is my memory.  Before I really knew what had happened and before I had a chance to start crying, which I’m sure happened anyway, my dad was with me.  He stood me up, brushed off my knees and picked up my bike.  Most importantly, he put me right back on my bike and made me try again.

So, I guess today is all about getting back on the bike.  I am reminded how many people are still around me to support me in my experiences, but ultimately I still must begin to learn to ride without my training wheels.

In His Hands,

David

Discerning my call to serve, part 2

As I promised in my last post, I will share a little bit more information about Episcopal Urban Intern Program.

EUIP is a year-long program that runs from late August this year until mid August next year. I will be living with the other interns in the program (there are six of us total) and we will be sharing three bedrooms and a common/kitchen area in a rectory on church property at St. Stephen’s Episcopal Church in Hollywood. Each intern will have a full-time volunteer placement somewhere in the Los Angeles area.

For anyone who is familiar with EUIP (which you probably are if you’ve talked to me any time in the past two months), you might be saying to yourself “Hollywood? I thought she was going to Inglewood!?” At the time I applied to EUIP this winter, it was situated in the community of Inglewood. Starting with the 2009-2010 intern class, however, we will be situated in Hollywood. The set up is pretty much exactly the same as before and the congregation in Hollywood is very similar to the former one in Inglewood. Both churches are small, multicultural, bilingual, urban parishes. Both churches have a strong commitment to social justice. But the location in Hollywood is a bit more urban and the neighborhood is easier to get around. Thanks to the move, we will be situated closer to the metro and bus lines as well as grocery stores, cafes, etc. I was attracted to EUIP because of its connection to a bilingual urban parish with social justice-oriented roots, so I’m glad that part of the program is staying intact during the transition into Hollywood. I’m hoping that my year in LA, particularly at a bilingual parish, will help my Spanish skills. Being able to effectively communicate in Spanish would enhance my ability to serve those around me.

In addition to all of the info about the move to Hollywood, I also recently received a list of my roommates next year. Thanks to technology, we’ve all been able to “meet” each other before we actually head out west; I’m even Facebook friends with two of them (and we all know that means we’re true friends for life). In the first email we received a list of names and email addresses for all of the roommates and I have to admit that my inferiority complex kicked in as I read the list of addresses. Every .edu email address had major name recognition and so I just sat there thinking “how can I even be in the same program with people from these schools!?” Luckily, I got over that quickly.

I will say, however, that if the little information I know about my roommates is any indication, we will have a very interesting year. There are three male and three female roommates. We are a very diverse group racially, religiously, geographically, and educationally. I’m trying as hard as I can not to make any pre-conceived notions about my roommates, but when you only have a little bit of information and have to wait three months to meet them in person, it’s hard not to (at least for me). As fellow blogger Amanda pointed out to me, however, they probably have just as many pre-conceived notions about me as I do about them. I can’t wait to meet them and talk to them and get to know them in person, though. And here’s a fun fact for you: one of my roommates speaks Old English.

In the coming weeks, I’ll be starting to figure out where my volunteer placement will be for the year. I’m hoping to work with teenagers or young adults in some capacity, though I’m pretty open to different experiences. I will keep you all posted and, if you have any questions, feel free to ask them here or to email me.

Peace,
Jordan

Discerning my call to serve

I don’t know if I can honestly say that I ever really “decided” to do a year of service; as I started thinking about what to do after graduation, the only options that came to mind were service programs. I can’t pinpoint exactly when I knew this was what I wanted to do. Rather, I think it was a series of small personal changes that were so individually subtle but, combined, were completely transformational that led me to where I am today and I where I will be going this year. I can say, without a doubt, that I wouldn’t be doing this if I hadn’t taken classes in liberation theology & social justice or spent some time volunteering at the Salvation Army soup kitchen in Tiffin.

I think many, if not most, of us have had some sort of experience when we’re exposed to something that challenges what we believe and why we believe it. It forces us out of our normal modes of thinking and out of our comfort zones. When faced with these situations, we can ignore what is being presented to us and go on with our lives as though nothing has happened. Or we can make the decision to address what we have learned, choosing to be open to the changes that new knowledge and experiences can bring. I would, unequivocally, place my experiences from my classes and from my volunteer work in the second category. My classes in liberation theology and social justice and my volunteer experiences made me aware of so many systemic injustices that pervade our world, injustices I cannot ignore.
After recognizing that doing a year of service was the way I felt called to deal with these social injustices, I spent a lot of time trying to figure out what program I wanted to do. There are a lot of great service year programs and I researched quite a few of them (City Year, AmeriCorps, Jesuit Volunteer Corps, Lutheran Volunteer Corps, Episcopal Young Adult Service Corps [international service], and Episcopal Service Corps [domestic service]) but I always came back to the idea that I wanted to do something through the Episcopal Church. This decision was solidified after I had the chance to talk with David Copley, the Mission Personnel Officer for the Episcopal Church. I mentioned my interest in a year of service and we talked about a lot of the programs and through that conversation I realized how important it is for me to have a church-based support system during my year of service. Because I am most comfortable with the doctrine, worship, and outreach of the Episcopal Church, Episcopal Service Corps seemed like a perfect fit. And so, the decision to apply for ESC was made.

Something that attracted me to ESC is the fact that it is really just a consortium of various Episcopal Service programs. ESC has been forming in the last couple of years to make these programs more accessible and to make the application process easier. The format of the program allowed me to research the individual programs and then apply to whichever ones I chose through a common application process. In the end, I chose to apply to four different programs: New York Intern Program (NYC), Johnson Intern Program (Chapel Hill, NC), Trinity Volunteer Corps (Washington, DC), and Episcopal Urban Intern Program (EUIP).

After completing my application, I interviewed with each program, one interview per week for four weeks (from first to last: NYIP, JIP, EUIP, and TVC). Going into the interview process, I really thought I knew what I wanted. I was interested in something new and challenging and was open to being in any of the programs, but I really thought I wanted to head to Washington or New York. In retrospect, I can’t even really remember the rationale behind those preferences. After every interview, I was sure I would love that particular program. It was after my Los Angeles interview, however, that I knew I’d found the program that was right for me. The interview lasted an hour and, aside from the questions directly related to the program, included topics such as ubuntu, summer camp, music stores in Columbus, Freaks and Geeks, and what it was like going to a school where one’s beliefs (whether political, religious, etc.) are a minority. I found myself speaking so openly and freely about my beliefs, passions, strengths, and weaknesses. I didn’t feel like I was censoring myself at all; it was the one interview in which I didn’t feel the need to impress. Out of all of my interviewers, Jason (the program director from EUIP), really seemed to take an interest in getting to know who I am instead of just hearing my answers to questions and seeing how they fit into pre-conceived ideas of what future interns should say. Receiving a placement offer from EUIP was definitely one of the best moments of my life. I’m looking forward to a new city, new people, and new challenges.

I have a lot more to say about the program, where I’ll be living and what I’ll be doing, but I’ll save that for another blog.

Peace,
Jordan